Her Son
by strawberryy2345
Summary: [oneshot] Narcissa's thoughts as she feels the living, breathing body of Harry Potter beneath her, and the thoughts that simultaneously condemn her master and save her son. DH spoilers


**Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of the characters. And there are a few direct quotes from Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, which I also do not own. **

**"Besides, the world isn't split into good people and Death Eaters. We have all got both light and dark inside us. What matters is the power we choose to act on. That's who we really are" Sirius Black**

* * *

"I thought he would come" said Voldemort, in his high clear voice, his eyes on the leaping flames. "I expected him to come." 

The silence felt oppressive. Narcissa felt herself praying that Harry would come. Please come. Please come. Please come, she chanted in her head, repeating the mantra over and over. If he didn't, the fighting would continue until he was killed. Draco was in the middle of the fighting; he was stuck and stranded in the castle. Please, for Draco, please come out.

She closed her eyes, hoping Harry would magically appear before her. She opened them; he wasn't there. Forcing herself to remain calm, she remembered that her son was being watched over by Severus. Severus would make sure he was alright, wouldn't he? And Draco was with Vincent and Gregory. They'd take care of him, right?

"I was, it seems…mistaken" Voldemort's voice pierced through the air, his high cold voice biting them.

Please, God, make him come, she silently prayed.

"You weren't"

Narcissa turned around suddenly, and saw a sight fit for Heaven. He was here. He was here. He was here, she repeated, completely ignoring everyone, concentrating solely on Harry and Voldemort. She prayed he would kill Harry fast; she needed to get back inside; her son needed her. Finally, Harry Potter would die, and Voldemort could move on. And her son would live. Please be alive.

But as much as she wished Harry to die fast, she couldn't help but gape at him. He wasn't even holding a wand. He stood there, staring straight into Voldemort's eyes, staring straight at death.

A Pause- a yell- a flash of green light-a body crumpling to the floor- and it was finally over.

At that moment, for the first time in her life, she felt sorry for Lily Potter. Harry, Harry had been her son. She had always thought she would be happy, joyous when Harry Potter died. But the feeling inside of her was at complete odds to what she should be feeling. She thought of her own son, Draco, and almost became hysterical, fighting to keep the tears from her face. He was only seventeen, so _young_, and he might be dead. Mothers were not supposed to bury their children.

For the first time in her life, she saw Harry as something other than the annoying child who wouldn't die. He was her child's classmate, had gone to school with her son for six years, had played opposite him in countless Quidditch matches. Poor Lily. Harry had been Lily's son, and while the two stood for everything that she, Narcissa, was against, it did not change the fact that Harry was Lily's son, and that Lily had loved her child. At least Narcissa had had 17 years with Draco; Lily had had one.

She found herself praying to God that she would have more years. Seventeen simply wasn't enough. Draco had so much more to do in his life. What about him graduating school, starting work, getting married, having kids himself? He had more to live for than the Cause.

What had the Cause gotten her? A dead father, a dead mother, an estranged sister, a fanatical sister, a dead cousin, a husband in jail, a son who might have... passed away. She couldn't bring herself to say it. It was too final.

Draco is still alive. Draco is still alive. Draco is still alive. She repeated the mantra, a glimmer of hope in the otherwise bleak future.

I must be dreaming, she thought, for before her eyes she thought she saw Harry frown slightly. But he's _dead._ She'd seen plenty of people die before, had even killed a few herself; she intimately knew the way their bodies fell to the floor, and Harry was definitely dead. He was incredibly lucky to have escaped the killing curse once, but _twice_?

Please be alive. Please be alive. Please be alive. She found herself now silently chanting. She didn't know why, but for some reason, she wanted him to live. If Harry Potter could survive the Avada Kedavra spell twice, then her son could have survived in the castle. Harry would have seen him. He could tell her. Please be alive. Please be alive. She wasn't even sure who she was talking about anymore.

Both, she realized. The two boys had become entwined as one in her head. Please be alive, she begged.

Feeling a short burst of pain, Narcissa was pulled back into her harsh reality. She went forward to examine the boy who was at the center of everyone's thoughts. Feeling his heart beat, she knew he was alive…But was her son? Shielding them with her hair, with her heart in her throat, she asked him quietly, "Is Draco alive?"

"Yes" he softly whispered.

Relief like she had never felt before in her life flooded through her. Nothing compared to how light she felt, _nothing_. Not when she had gotten married, not when she had gotten pregnant, not when she had taken the Unbreakable Vow.

At that moment, she made the biggest defiance of her life, never hesitating for a second. "He is dead!" She yelled, simultaneously and unknowingly sealing the fate of her master and her son, and the entire wizarding world. But all she thought was Draco.

He's alive. He's alive. Harry's seen him. He's alive, she smiled, repeating it over and over, drawing strength from the mantra. She needed to hurry them up, needed to get back to the castle. Slipping back into the circle, she found herself again praying to God, or whoever, that they would go to the castle already.

Finally, after forever, they headed towards the castle, to tell the good news of Harry's death. It had been a while since Harry had been in the castle. What if something had happened since then? She started to become desperate. She needed to _see_ him, to _feel_ him, make sure he was still alive.

And so she quietly slipped away, losing herself in the multitudes of people, and set out in search of her son.

* * *

**A/N Review please! Im in a fairly bad mood, and a review would really brighten my day!! I think the beginning was a little rocky, but you tell me what you think :) lol**

**Anyways, I will definitely be updating DADA Owls this weekend. I really meant to write that instead of this, but I had a dream about this last night. And who am I to refuse such an obvious request to write this? Anyways, tell me what you think!**

**And lastly, who else is excited for the premiere of The Golden Compass tomorrow? and for the trailer for Prince Caspian? I know I am!!!**


End file.
